Latest Hindi Movies Punjabi Movies Latest Ghazal Collection

Sexy Sms


Boy: Breast ke taraf ishara keraty hway, Amme Amme ye kiya hain
Amme: Beta ye Ghubaray Hain.
Boy: Tu Amme massi k baray kyun hain.
Amme: Tumnay kub daikhay.
Boy: Jub papa un main hawa bhar rahay thay
------------------------------------------------------------------------


Ek hindi ke teacher ki khuli zip dekh kar class ki ladkiyan hansene lagein

...
Teacher ko gussa aya teacher ne ladkiyon se kaha ke hehehe karna bandh karo
warna nikaal kar khara kardonga
 -------------------------------------------------------------------------


A sardar was running with his pregnent wife,who was about to deliver, when
another sardar asked him, O pernam singh, oye woti nu ais haal vitch le ke
kithey puj rya vain, pernam singh replied,assi Pizza hut chaley aan, sunya
othey free delivery hondi aay
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


What's the closest thing to a woman's period?
Your salary.
It comes once a month,
lasts About 3 or 4 days and if it doesn't come, everything's fucked
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ik Larki thi dewaani si...

Ik Larkay pe wo mar...

Kuch lena tha usay...

Lakin pregnancy se wo darti thi

Jab bi milti thi muijhey.....

Ye hi pocha karti thi......

Ye "CONDOM" kAHAN SE MILTA HAI
Ye "CONDOM" kAHAN SE MILTA HAI
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

The most difficult golf course in the world is... "Women Hole" any
style you play... as many shots you try... & as much perfection you have...

you
can never get your balls in...!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


BUY A SCOOTY.....PICK UP A BEAUTY, DRINK A FROOTY.... TAKE HER TO OOTY,

REMOVE HER NIGHTY...DO UR DUTY..AFTER 9 MONTHS ... GET A CUTY
---------------------------------------------------------------------------




I really deeply wish tat u r here with me in my room. on my bed & lights off

& we get under the cover together.. 2 show u my glow in the dark watch.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Press down down more Ok more YES ahh ohh yes almost there yeah oh shit

harder SO GOOD ! mmmmm That's how I sex on text !
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Girl: Is dress ka kya price hai? Shopkeeper: Sirf 5 kiss. Girl: Aur us dress

ka?
Shopkeeper: 10 kiss. Girl: Dono dress pack kar do, bill daadi dengi.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

  Lastnite i went 2 bed without u..cold,naked,thinking of u, missing ur

warmth, ur soft touch against my skin. Where were u lastnite,
my lovely pyjamas
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


What do you call a wife who is sexy,
beautiful, intelligent, understanding,
caring, never jealous and a great cook?
ANSWER : A rumor!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Come here,take off urs pants and knickers, get on top of me, enjoy until u

get satisfied, loving urs.....toilet!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Always start your day with a lot of... S E X
S - SMILE
E - ENERGY
X - XCITEMENT
so make S E X a daily habit, and youll always B SUCSEXFUL! in LIFE.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


1 boy 1 girl ko fuck ker raha tha fuck kertay kertay us ne girl se
poocha k tumhara boy friend kon hai hai girl ne reply kia choro us ma k

kooos ko
wo is waqt yeh sms per raha hai ! ! !
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Cream ke Add main face dikhaya. Soap ke Add main Hath Dikhaya. Shampoo Ki

Add main Baal Dikhaye. Per Always ki Add main kuch nahi dikhaya.
Thats Cheating
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Kiss Pan Chod ne Gand main ungali ki hai. Ager wo Maa ka lora samney aa jaye

to us Kuri chod ko dekh loon. Sir, aapka student gand marwa le ga per kisi

ko kabi gali nahi de ga ! !
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Lastnite i went 2 bed without u..cold,naked,thinking of u, missing ur

warmth, ur soft touch against my skin. Where were u lastnite, my lovely

pyjamas
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


He came at night,
explored my body,
got on top of me,
touched me,
he bit, sucked, swalowd,
when he was satisfyed,
he left,
i was hurt,
BLOODY... MOSQUITO !!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

AIK LERKA LERKI SAY: MAY KUNVARI LERKIYOO SAY SEX NAHI KERTA
LERKI : VO KIYOO
LERKA : KYOON K MUJHAY KHOON KHARABA PASAND NAHI HAI
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Girl MOM se jab main susu karte hun tu siti ki awaz ati hai par ap
ki nahi ati kiun?
MOM replies : baita siti tu maire b bajti the lekin tere bap ne baja baja
kar kharab kardi.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

 
How To Teach Mathmatics To A Girl.
1st add lips
2nd minus clothes
3rd divide legs
and then start Multiplication in the Sweetest Point.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Gandoo ki 3 nishaniyan:
1. Hamesha bewaqt miss call dega.
2. Gande Gande SMS muskra kar parhe ga.
3. Don't scroll down:








Jis baat ko mana karo wo zaroor kare ga.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


dekho eik couple sex kar raha hai

ah
oh

dheere
ah

mar gayi
ah
oh

ahah

chal ab bas kar

1 rupee k sms mein kya pori blue film dikhaon
----------------------------------------------------------------

PAPA : vo kon si cheez hai jis k charoo taraf baal hotay hain
SON : papa may bataoo
PAPA :nahi tum chup rahoo
SON : may batata hoo ..... AANKH
PAPA : ohh haan
SON : to kya aap lun samajh rahay thay
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


AIK LERKA LERKI SAY: MAY KUNVARI LERKIYOO SAY SEX NAHI KERTA
LERKI : VO KIYOO
LERKA : KYOON K MUJHAY KHOON KHARABA PASAND NAHI HAI
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


A Peach is Peach, A Plum is Plum
A Kiss isn't a Kiss without some tongue
So Open your mouth, Close your eyes
and Give your tongue some exercise
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Love is a Gambling, Don't play with it
Guys get fun, Girls get blame
10 minutes of fun, 9 months of pain
Then a baby comes out without any name.
Enjoy it or think it before you do it.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Similarity between Viagra & Rail reservation counter? Both make you
stand for 1 hour for a 2 minute job...
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Modern medicines: Fucknostat, Sexprazole, Sucksproxyvon, Hugglofnac,
Kisstopache, Spermicidin, Breastajin, Ejaculatomol, Vaginalgin, Penisciloc,
Orgasmofen.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Aayi thi diwali,
shuru Hui thand,
sikudi thi chut,
akade the lund

Aa gai holi,
chali gai thand,
khul gayi chut,
latak Gaye lund Urdu
Lund pe aitbaar kisko hai,
Mil jaaye chodne ko to inkar kis ko hai,
Kuch mushkilen hai chut paane me dost Warna muth marne se pyaar kisko hai .

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

On the wedding night Santa says: Bataao Hairan karoon ya Pareshan?
Jeeto: Dono.
He shows his tiny 1inch penis & says: Kyun hairani hui?
Jeeto: Ji Hui.
Hubby: Ab pareshan karoon?
Jeeto: Ji.
Santa: Yeh erect hai!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Ladki K Baap Ne Vidai K Waqt Dulhe Se Kaha "Beta hamari Izzat Ab
Tumhare Haath Mein Hai.Dulha Bola:"Chinta Mat Kijiye Aaj Hi Loot Loonga!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Sardarni: kal raat 3 chor aaye aur mera rape karke chale
gaye.Sardar: tumne unhe roka nahi?Sardarni: bahot roka par bole ab aur

taakat
nahi hai, kal aayenge
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


"HONEYMOON"
H-hawas mita do
O-or chuso
N-nanga karke
E-ek hi jhatke mein
Y-yeh gaya
M-mar dala
O-or dalo
O-or tez
N-ni..k..a.. l...g..a. y..a
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Q: Wats d definition of a 'lesbian?' A: Just another damn Woman.....
tryin 2 do a man's job!!!.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Qus: Who is senior,
PENIS or VAGINA.

A:VAGINA
b'cos PENIS always stands up when he sees a VAGINA..So respect the seniors!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

During sexual session the girl says:"u r like a mobile phone!"Boy:
"Do I vibrate a lot?" Girl:"No,when u get in 2 d tunnel u loose network
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Patni ne Arz kiya hai ki....
"Zara Dhire se CHODO Sanam,
Mehangai ka Zamana hai..
2 inch ki Chut ko Zindagi Bhar Chalana hai.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Richman to poorman- "How-come ur penis so big?
Poorman-replied:
"B'coz in my childhood i had no other toys to play"!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Sardar wid Grandson.Late nite Shouts,"I need a Girl,I hv an
Erection!" Gson says,"1st its 2 Late,2nd ur 75yrs Old,3rd d Cock u holdin is
mine"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


4 road signs which stands in front of a womans vagina....
1)Caution-dark tunnel. 2)Drive carefully-road wet n slippery. 3)Go slow.4)

Men
at work
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


barrish ho aur zameen gilli na ho,dhup niklay aur surso pilli na ho, to phir

app nay yeh kasay soch liya kay neend may ap ki yaad ahay aur shalwar
gili na ho.. English
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

3 gushtian apas men apni khuwahshien bol rahi thi... pehli gashti:
mere 2 husband hon jo saari raat lagain... doosri gashti: mere 4 husband hon

jo
din raat ki shift lagain....teesri gashti: mera ek hee shohar ho uska chhota

sa
lund ho us se mera ek cute beta ho jp bada ho kar cricketer baney jab

worldcup
ka final ho last ball per 2 runs ki zarurat ho aur wo out hojaye aur 16

crore
awam kahey teri MAA ko Lun..............
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

English
Girl and boy lost in jungle After two days of struggle for food and
water, girl said-dear plz fuck me. boy sasid: why? girl said: abey kuch to

ander
jayega.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Girl to Mom: Ammi ammi aaj main collage nahian jahoon gi
Mom: Lakin keun
Girl: Larkay TANG kartay hain
Mom: Chal jhutti Larkay to KHULLI kartay hain
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Free Pick up + Dinner + Nigtht Stay + Malish is just one call away,
Just dail 15 (police) and say Tussi Saray panchod ho Urdu
Aik khusray nay viagra kha lee. Ander se awaz aye ittala-un araz hay
k app k system main matlooba sahulat muysaar nahin hay.
----------------------------------------------------------------
1 Admi ne Nargis ko Goad mein bitha k pocha Tum 1 raat mein kitna kama leti ho? Nargis:Rs.50,000 Admi:Such bta? Nargis:ROZI pe baithi hn Jhot thori Bolon Gee
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Wife: husband ka Lund pakarr k boli: Mere Laal mere sonay uth ja na...! Husband: abay is ko choot mein lena hai ya school bhejna hai...?
----------------------------------------------------------------
Load shedding ki musibat. Ek admi raat ko apne ghar gaya. darwaza knock kia. Bivi:kon? Admi:Guddu da abbu! Bivi:Haaye main marr jaawan,phir andar kon hai?
----------------------------------------------------------------
 Hamare USTAD BABA farmate hain, BETA! Jaisay Phooli Hui Roti Kabhi Kacchi Nahin Hoti, Waise Hi Brazier pehni Hui Larki Kabhi Bacchi nahi hoti Geo Ustad..
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Height Of Embarrassment : . Man Sitting Wid his Wife in Park Another Lady Comes to his Wife & Says; “Paise Pehly Le lena, ye admi Baad Mai Bohat Lafra Krta Hy.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Man to salesman: ye kachhe ki kya gurantee hai? Salesman: Tum 12 floor ki building se jump karo, gand fategi lekin yeh kachha nahi!
------------------------------------------------------------------
1admi ka gala Rat ko khrab Ho gya Wo Dr k gahr gaya 0r Bhot ahsta Pocha Doctor Saab Hai Dr ki Bv Os say B ahista Boli Nhi Hy aajao.! :D
------------------------------------------------------------------
Sardar rozana sex tablet khata Friend: yar na teri Wife hay na Girlfrend phir Q khata hay? Sardar : Bus aisay hi underwear mai ronak lagi rehti hay
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Loffer or Offer Mein Kaya diffrence Hy? Student-Simple Madam Larka I Love U' Bolay To Loffer Or Larki 'I Love U Bolay To Offer
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Taxi Driver: Madam aap 3rd Pregnant Lady Hongi jisy me airport chorny ja rha hn. Madam: But i m not pregnant. Driver: Abi airport b to ni aya na.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
puraney dour main kamyaab honey k leyeh sirf 2 lafz kafi they. PARHNA LIKHNA . aaj k dour main b kamyaab honey k leyeh 2 lafz kafi haien . TATTEY CHUKNA
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Girl: Kya Tum Mujhe Apni Fmly se zada chaty ho? Boy: No Girl: Q? Boy: Jb me Paida howa to Meri Maa ne musibat jheli Jb Bara hone laga to Bap ne  i Jb Zarurat pari to Bhai 7 aya Girl: Kutte k Bachy jb  khara hoa to me yad agai .
--------------------------------------------------------------------
MUTH marne ke 11 Faayde 1:- Self Reliance 2:- Time Convience 3:- Prevention of Crime 4:- Mental Choice of Lady 5:- No Risks of AIDS 6:- No Special place Requirement 7:- No Wastage of Cash 8:- Easy to Perform 9:- No fear of early ejaculation 10:- Guranteed Satisfaction 11:- No Risk of Being Caught So moral is Badnammi de Phuddi naalon izzat de Muth Changi hai
---------------------------------------------------------------------
ek larki galti se apna bra khidki se bahir phendeti hai ... to road se ek doodh wala guzar ta hai .. phir wo bra usk pas aker girta hai .. wo larki se kehta hai .. o madam aap k doodh k dkahan girr gaey... .....
----------------------------------------------------------------------
boy:i can kiss u even without touching u ...!! girl: u can`t... boy: lagi 20 20 ki shart girl : ok (boy kiss tightly) girl: jey u touched me ....!! biy: ya lo 20 rupay ...
----------------------------------------------------------------------

No comments:

Post a Comment